I am not a psychologist or a therapist, but I have been a human for many years. One of the things I have learned is this:

 

Stress is a fact of life. Being stressed is a choice.

 

Don’t reject it because it sounds simple.

Don’t beat yourself up about it if you have a hard time managing your stress.

We are all growing in different areas at different times.

Our natural dispositions might make this easier for some and more difficult for others.

Don’t compare. Just believe that the statement is true.

 

Stress is a fact of life. Being stressed is a choice.

 

Here are four A’s that can help us make better choices in managing our stress.

 

1. Acknowledgement. Begin by acknowledging how you feel. If you feel stressed, acknowledge that. Notice the physical sensations in your muscles, your heart rate, your breathing, etc. Name it. Describe it. There is great value in being consciously aware of how you feel, rather than unconsciously being controlled by it.

 

2. Acceptance. The next step is to accept it. This is how you feel right now. You might not want to feel this way, but you do. Take a deep breath. Accept it. You won’t feel this way forever, but you do feel this way right now. Take a deep breath. Accept it. The steps you are taking might help; they might not. Take a deep breath. Accept it. Notice that you are OK. Although you are feeling stressed, you are OK.

 

3. Alternative (Reframe). Now that you have acknowledged and accepted how you feel, is there an alternative way of looking at this? Can you reframe it? Can the stress before a presentation or interview be reframed as excitement? Can the stress before a performance be turned into fuel? Can the challenge be seen as an opportunity? Can the relational issue be an opportunity for personal growth? I know these sound cheesy, but they can work. They really can. Don’t lie to yourself. Shift your perspective enough to manage the stress.

 

4. Action. Finally, take action. I don’t mean making a decision or taking action on the situation causing the stress. Sometimes it is wise to wait until you are in a different frame of mind and thinking clearly to make decisions. What I mean is MOVE. Work out your stress through physical movement. Go for a walk. Clean the kitchen. Take some action. Do something physical. It works.

 

These four A’s aren’t the whole picture.

They aren’t magic.

But they can help.

And that can make a big difference in the quality of your life and health.

 

Stress is a fact of life. Being stressed is a choice.

Acknowledgment. Acceptance. Alternative. Action.

 

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